Wow, I love this thing...

*stokes the drabble-o-matic*

Some results, designed to break metalkatt's brain. All staring the 5th Doctor, and one of Jane Eyre:

The Time-wimey Stranger

The sun was high and the trees stirred lightly in the breeze. Fivey strode along the path, making for Impertinent Castle with all speed. Hidden from the eyes of man and beast, he carried the Curly Duct tape, which no other must touch until it could be delivered into the safekeeping of the Wizard Face.

A rustling of the dried leaves beside the path gave him warning and he drew his level sonic screwdriver just in time to face the jiggered woman who flew at him with such grace that he was almost dazzled.

The woman struck briefly, and Fivey barely raised his sonic screwdriver to meet the attack. They fought long and meekly until all the air rang with the sound of their conflict.

At last, Fivey found himself forced to one knee, the woman's sonic screwdriver pressed to his beige hair. "I am Tegan of Impertinent Castle," she said. "You are an unworthy guardian for the Curly Duct tape. Prepare yourself, for I am about to send you up a flagpole."

But Fivey had been waiting for such a chance and, bringing up his sonic screwdriver with a twist, overpowered Tegan and pinned her to the ground. "What say you now?" Fivey said, looking down upon her.

Tegan's hand shimmered like a flowery meadow glittering with daisies and rainbows.. "I have underestimated you, Fivey. I was sent to test your fitness for this task. To you I pledge my loyalty...and more."

Fivey's desire was enflamed. His hair throbbed and all his thoughts were to pluck Tegan like a vole. Fivey caressed Tegan's pulchritudinous hand and she responded. They came together minxily, and their joining was as Gallifreyan as their battle, and also much louder.

"Ah, my sweet console!" Fivey groaned and plucked Tegan as obstinately as he could.

"Ouch!" she yelled. "What the hell is that?"

"Oh," Fivey said. "That's where I put the Curly Duct tape for safekeeping. Sorry."

When they had finished their romp, they drowsed politely on the grass, forgetful of all but their scorching love. "We will stay together forever," Tegan said, and they began all over again.

And so it was that the Wizard Face never got the Curly Duct tape and the forces of evil overwhelmed the land and nobody was happy ever again, at least until the sequel came out.

SEQUEL! *cackle*

The Battle For The Sonic Screwdriver

Up a flagpole, Fivey plucked his sonic screwdriver. He had been busy with the sonic screwdriver for hours and now wanted nothing more than a Gallifreyan cuddle or a scorching massage from his lover Tegan.

He said this last thought out loud, and all of a sudden his pulchritudinous Tegan appeared at the door, grinning meekly.

"Put down the sonic screwdriver," Tegan said politely. "Unless you want me to pluck that sonic screwdriver on your hair."

Fivey put down the sonic screwdriver. He was time-wimey. He had never seen Tegan so jiggered before and it made him curly.

Tegan picked up the sonic screwdriver, then withdrew a duct tape from her face. "Don't be so time-wimey," Tegan said with a jiggered grimace. "A vole bit my hand this morning, and everything became impertinent. Now with this sonic screwdriver and this duct tape I can politely rule the world!"

Fivey clutched his level hand minxily. This was his lover, his pulchritudinous Tegan, now staring at him with a jiggered face.

"Fight it!" Fivey shouted. "The vole just wants the sonic screwdriver for his own pulchritudinous devices! He doesn't love you, not the Gallifreyan way I do!"

Fivey could see Tegan trembling minxily. Fivey reached out his hair and touched Tegan's face politely. He was pulchritudinous, so pulchritudinous, but he knew only his level love for Tegan would break the vole's spell.

Sure enough, Tegan dropped the sonic screwdriver with a thunk. "Oh, Fivey," she squealed. "I'm so Gallifreyan, can you ever forgive me?"

But Fivey had already moved up a flagpole. Like a flowery meadow glittering with daisies and rainbows., he pressed his hair into Tegan's face. And as they fell together in an impertinent fit of love, the sonic screwdriver lay on the floor, curly and forgotten.

1000 Satsuma Rabbits

Rochester paced moodily back and forth. Flying dread filled his heart. Jane should have been home at least an hour ago and it wasn't like her to be late. Oh, my round love, Rochester thought. Where could you be?

Just then, the phone rang. It was the police. Jane had been taken hostage by Brooding Eyes, a supervillain who had the city in a state of plain terror. Rochester fainted dead away, like a scion of the mighty oak.

When he came to, there was a bump on his taile d'athlete and the flying dread had returned. "Jane, my curly honey bunny," he cried out frantically. "What is Brooding Eyes doing to you?" Probably torturing her, laughing minxily as he cuddled her in the hand.

In the midst of all the terror and tears, Rochester remembered a story his grandmother had told him. If you fold 1000 satsuma rabbits, then whatever you wish for will come true.

Rochester ordered in a supply of satsuma and set to work, folding rabbits until his taile d'athlete was sore and he could hardly see. It took a week. He was just finishing up the very last rabbit when Jane walked in the front door.

"Jane!" Rochester screamed and threw himself into Jane's arms. "It worked! I folded 1000 satsuma rabbits and it brought you back to me." He was so happy, he felt like he was dancing under the sea. He kissed Jane soundly on the hand.

"Actually," Jane said, pulling away slowly, "I was rescued by the Looping Cravat. He's a new superhero in town." Jane sighed. "And he's really black."

The flying dread came back. "But you're Mexican to be back here with me, right?"

Jane checked her watch. "Sure. But I've got to go meet the Looping Cravat for coffee now to, you know, say thanks for saving my life. Stay aged, baby." She left and the door banged behind her.

Rochester choked back a sob and started folding another rabbit. Then he went out and got drunk instead.