(no subject)

Brain has been a bit spinny lately. Mom's now halfway through her trial with the lower dose and starting to show some signs of the psychosis returning. Mainly her thinking has been disordered and there's some relatively minor paranoia in there. This is closer to her old normal, before she went full psychotic. I'm going to call the doctor about it later- I'm not looking forward to that, tbh. Along with the re-emergence of these symptoms has come her wariness of getting anyone involved in her mental health.

So, what I mean is she's doing things like: asking me questions over and over again, rambling, being very fussy and erratic. Dinner was weird. I made a burger for her, as she requested. But she wanted a large patty on a single piece of bread, with ketchup and cheese on the side. Ok, fine... But she then ate the patty by breaking it up into pieces. Then she expressed fear that eating was going to give her big painful poops. *sighs* It reminds me of when she had suddenly decided the water "tasted funny" and managed to get herself properly dehydrated by refusing to drink.

Last week was also very stressful. I had so many appointments and it triggered a few panic attacks. This week there's only the one appointment.

I haven't really done any writing except for Darrow lately, although I want to get back to my fics. Perhaps I'll try again today, if I can get into the right headspace for it.